John Gottman often talks about the Emotional Bank Account within a relationship. Every time a good or positive interaction takes place, a deposit is made.
Each time a negative interaction occurs, a withdrawal occurs.
Gottman found that strong, stable couples often had 5 Positive to every 1 Negative interaction that occurred within their relationship. They are positive 5 times more than they are negative!
It's okay to make suggestions about what your partner could change, be late for a date or have a bad day. Nobody is perfect, but you need to make sure that these withdrawals aren't over- drafting your account.
What's in your bank account?
What are some of the big deposits that your spouse does for you?
Check out The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work and Why Marriages Succeed or Fail: And How You Can Make Yours Last for more information.
Thats a good way of looking at things!!
ReplyDeleteInteresting!
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