In life, people say and do stupid things. I have learned, however, that offensive or hurtful words and actions are usually not intended to be so. They are generally poorly formed thoughts or misunderstood actions. This applies in marriage as well. If you are the good, honest woman you ought to be and if you have married a good man, he would never intentionally hurt you. Would you intentionally hurt him?
If the answer was yes, stop right there. Change yourself. Why would you ever hurt the person most important in your life?
If the answer was no, as it should be, think on it. "I would never intentionally hurt my husband and he would never intentionally hurt me. " What a freeing statement! How much easier is it to not take offense and to forgive if you truly believe this statement?
Your marriage will be so peaceful and happy if you live by the belief that you would never do anything to intentionally hurt your spouse.
Let's do some examples:
- Change this thought, "How could Husband leave the trash can overflowing again after we have decided this to be his chore?! He must not respect me." into this thought "Silly Husband, he forgot to empty the trash can again. He must have a lot on his mind."
- Change this thought, "Why isn't Husband coming on to me tonight? He must think I am undesirable." into this thought, "Husband hasn't hit on me tonight. He must be feeling unloved. I think I'll start some hanky panky."
- Change this thought, "Why did he buy me a blanket for my birthday? He knew I wanted a new pair of jeans." into this thought, "He bought me a blanket, how sweet! He knows I'm always cold when we cuddle up on the couch to watch a movie."
Have you had an experience where you chose to recognize Husband's good intentions?