What's in Your Bank Account?

John Gottman often talks about the Emotional Bank Account within a relationship.

Every time a good or positive interaction takes place, a deposit is made.

Each time a negative interaction occurs, a withdrawal occurs.

Gottman found that strong, stable couples often had 5 Positive to every 1 Negative interaction that occurred within their relationship. They are positive 5 times more than they are negative!

It's okay to make suggestions about what your partner could change, be late for a date or have a bad day. Nobody is perfect, but you need to make sure that these withdrawals aren't over- drafting your account.

What's in your bank account?

What are some of the big deposits that your spouse does for you?

Check out The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work and Why Marriages Succeed or Fail: And How You Can Make Yours Last for more information.

Money, Sex, and Happiness

I came across this article on WebMD that caught my attention. You can view the published article it's referring to here.

Sex is better for your happiness than money.

That's what these researchers from Dartmouth found. Pretty amazing-right? They found that "sex enters so strongly (and) positively in happiness equations that they estimate increasing intercourse from once a month to once a week is equivalent to the amount of happiness generated by getting an additional $50,000 in income for the average American."

"Overall, the happiest folks are those getting the most sex -- married people, who report 30% more between-the-sheets action than single folks. In fact, the economists calculate that a lasting marriage equates to happiness generated by getting an extra $100,000 each year."

That's a pretty hefty raise!

Finance Week at Happily Married After

Happily Married After is running a Finance Week complete with giveaways and fancy guest posters. It's pretty much a party. You should wear a hat.

{Bonnie Tsang Photography}

Sex & Money

Autonomy plays an integral role in a successful and fulfilling marriage. While I am all about dividing roles and responsibilities, I am equally passionate about educating yourself and taking control of your life. Whether you are the primary financial leader or your husband takes this role, it is vital that you be informed about your finances.

It is often said that sex and money are the top causes for contention, and even divorce, in marriage. By now you are all well on your way to having a rockin' hot sex life so here are a few conversation starters to be sure you and your honey are in harmony regarding your money matters:

• What steps are we taking to save money?
• What steps are we taking to invest money?
• Why are we saving/investing money?
• Do we have a budget?

{via}

Husband and I are completely obsessed with Mint.com. After a simple set up process, our income and spending are automatically tracked and categorized making it easy to see where we need to cut back spending. Mint.com has over 1 million users and has been named the best online personal finance tool by Money Magazine. It is fast, intuitive, and offers real solutions. Multiple users are allowed for one account making it easy for you to collaborate with your spouse. The iPhone application is one of my favorite features. Alerts for over-spending can be sent right to your pocket.

Even if you already have a budgeting system in place, I would highly recommend giving Mint.com a try. It is free and more importantly stands as an invaluable tool for understanding your finances. Take control, girls. You'll feel sexy, I'm sure.

Cha Ching! Banking

I share everything with Husband, including my bank account. It really has nothing to do with the money and everything to do with trust. Husband and I discuss purchases, we don't ask permission. We are a team. We know how the other feels about money and the way it is spent and we do our very best to respect that.

We have no secret bank accounts like Suze Orman suggests. In my opinion, secret bank accounts are recipes for disaster. While I understand why she encourages women to be protected and covered, I strongly feel hiding money makes room for doubt and distrust in your marriage. Wouldn't you feel betrayed if you found your husband had been hiding money?

What if the money is not hidden and your separate bank accounts are disclosed? Could there be harm done to your unity?

{Don't these love bugs look like old time bankers? It makes me smile. Via }

What do you think? Do you share a bank account with your man? If not, do you have a specific reason for the separation?